Poems - Creativity in Words

I think about you so much,
so many times I wish you were here.
Wanting you to give me wise words,
so I can let go of my fear.

I hear the others talking,
losing my own, is what I see.
Back into my shelf,
I don’t want to be me.

I want to be your ‘little girl’,
to hear you say my name.
Wanting to show you everything,
or to see what I became.

I want to be happy with who we are and what we have,
but it doesn’t matter anymore.
I learned to be silent about things,
now I’m disliked therefor.

I guess I’m terrible,
sometimes I hate myself for all I do.
But I know you will stand behind me,
dad, I really do miss you!

Fatigue numbs my body,
desperation conquers my mind.
My feelings are cheap and shoddy,
Wish I could leave it all behind…

Tired of waiting.
Waiting for you.
Got myself hating,
whatever I do.

I’ve done my best,
I’ve done all I could.
Apparently, I’m not up to the test.
Lets end this for good.

However, words are words,
and feelings are feelings.
They are like birds,
they both have different dealings.

It’s my strength,
it’s my weakness.
I wish I could,
but I can’t,
give up.

You’re still on my wall,
in my thoughts everyday.
Like to speak to you again,
knowing that day will come in some way.

It’s even harder these days,
with all those joyous faces around me.
I’d like to know what you’re thinking,
is there something you want me to see?

Everyone makes mistakes,
even I do, I have to admit.
But I will keep the promis I made,
even if you can’t remember it.

I will see you in the future,
love to talk to you someday!
You will always be there in my past,
you will never fade away.

Taking a great risc,
diving deep into the sea.
Act like someone else,
never being me.

How can I ruin someones day?
why listen to all the crap I say?
I know I have no live,
but I want you to survive!

Try to be a master of my own,
stand up and take the crown.
Why does live sucks sometimes,
burn the whole world down!

Sort out your own problems,
go away, and don’t leave them behind.
Shut up and walk,
cuz I’ve already to much on my mind!

Slowly falling apart,
don’t know how much more I can take!
Give me some time,
I need a break!

I don’t know who I am anymore,
it’s like I don’t have an alibi.
One moment I’m gonna burst out of anger,
the next moment I’m about to cry!

Why do people work on my nerves,
why don’t they just shut up.
Sometimes I hate my life,
other times my life is the top.

FUCK the world!
FUCK everything!
FUCK everybody!

Cut this goddamned crap and get a life!
Throw it all away, you’ll never make it alive!
For fuck sake, leave me alone!
Go away, there’s nothing here, nobody’s home!

Don’t talk to me, ignore me, I’m not here!
There’s a small line between agression and fear,
so don’t do it, don’t push me!
Things aren’t as they used to be…

Fuck it…

Tonight, I lost a friend.
Again…
The last weeks were nothing but pretend.
Damn…

Shattered memories flash through my mind.
How did it come this far?
It’s a feeling, so undefined.
I’m driving a steerless car…

It’s going on and on,
picking up friends, but also dropping them.
But the car is getting emptier, everybody’s gone.
I’m feeling lost, I don’t know where I am.

I’m feeling abandoned, left in the gutter.
What did I do wrong? My mind’s filled with clutter.
I don’t want it to end this way!
Please don’t leave, please say everything’s okay!

Think of what we’ve been through,
think of all the good times!
We even shared the same foo.
I couldn’t describe it in a million rhymes.

But no. It’s over.
The reason?
A girl.
Ofcourse…

But in the end, no one is to blame.
Mistakes are made, multiplied by love gone insane.
Misunderstanding added with forgotten rows ruins the game.

The game of life.
Goddamn, I hate this game!

Let all hate be directed towards me,
so that the world may be.
A better place,
without its inner face.

The face of hate,
that consumes our fate.
The sacrifice will be given,
I hope goodness will be driven.

Into a world with no spite,
where things will be right.
So please direct your hate,
I have chosen my fate.

Let the world be as one,
I have won.
Now strike me down,
so that the world will not drown.

Into the hate that is me,
LET THE WORLD BE FREE!
For I have won,
my final plan is done.

Inspired by Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion R2.

I am who I am,
nothing more nothing less.
If less then nothing is what I am,
my existence will be more then nothing..

However bizarre,
whatever I obsess.
Even from afar,
I am aboding.

The nothingness inside,
the emptiness of bitterness.
For all I am,
is a mortal made of flesh.

I hereby abide,
to not being actionless.
I won’t condemn myself,
to being unflesh.